Promises after promises continue to follow everywhere BBI lands. Some have been promised new positions, new shoes, title deeds, freedom from hunger and even eternal life.
This weekend, BBI lands in Meru with bigger than life promises. Besides promising to transform the Meru region to be the Singapore of East Africa, BBI is promising to real with the long-standing problem of makasiriko in the region.
Meru people have perpetually suffered from makasiriko induced pain, like the man who recently chopped off his hand to prove a point. The point was that nobody tells him what to do.
Even young people have not been spared, with one kindergarten pupil burning down a whole school to punish his pencil which he claimed was hiding somewhere.
“We understand the pain, destruction and losses that makasiriko has brought to this region,” said BBI Chief Architect Baba Raila Odinga. “We want to assure the people of Meru that as soon as BBI is implemented, the people here will be as calm and polite as British monks.”
Several local leaders praised the initiative. Meru Governor Kiraitu Murungi said, “It is well known that when a Meru tells you that he will cut your hand, it is already done. BBI promises to change all this.”
Other problems that BBI promised to solve in the region include injuries caused while milking buffalos, the problem of hot porridge, and the omnipresent letter n that appears in every Meru woNrd.