International Social

Smokers will now be Charged with Attempted Self Arson in South Africa

The South African government has decided to take the war on smoking to a new height, or if you like it, new low, by now declaring smoking an act of arson.

In the argument that presented at the Pretoria High Court, the government said that smokers were trying to set themselves on fire which is not a good way to commit suicide because it might be unsuccessful and thus requiring hospitalization. “Any act of self-immolation is not allowed in South Africa, and therefore we cannot allow smoking to go on in this country.”

The hard-line position held by the government is meant to help South Africans stay alive in the times of Covid-19, considering that production has gone to an all time low and the country is struggling with a huge national debt. “You cannot try to run away without paying your share of national debt. Setting yourself on fire by smoking cannot be tolerated.”

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The move now leaves South African smokers with few options, considering that most of them do not have access to hookah. The government suggested that those severely affected could try to cook using firewood as it has a similar effect.

Climate change experts also weighed into the matter, confirming that smoking was a serious cause of global warming and thus needs to stop. One self made climate change activist said that smoking one cigarette a day produces more smoke than the Volkswagen GTIs used by the police.

Say a prayer for the smokers in South Africa.

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