You know them very well from their exhaust noise. If you are deaf, you know them too because their behaviors are unique.
Their only objective on the road is to overtake your car in the hope that they can overtake your destiny too. They may not even be going anywhere, but they have to overtake you. It is the only purpose they have in life. Once they lock their eyes on you, not even the sharp corner will deter them from overtaking. It does not matter whether they have a new Forester or a remnant of a Subaru that has been handed down across 27 owners. They will do it!
They cling to the glory of Subaru which existed in the 80s when Subaru was Subaru, unaware that today Toyota is the largest shareholder of the Subaru Corporation. Most of them would not care whether the thing was had made in Japan or a product of Kamukunji: they only want the looks and the speed. All they need is to be admitted to the Subaru Owners Club. That marks their grand entry into Maslow’s apex.
While other people who drive machines like the Mercedes have just one star in their logo, these Subaru people insist on having six of them (they even claim that they are seven). Never mind they are too small to see. Their presence must be felt.
Subaru Drivers Explained
But why do we have Subaru drivers in the first place? Previously, it was thought that Subaru resulted from man eating poorly cooked bats, just like Corona. However, new research is emerging.
Research has shown that most Subaru drivers are trying to escape poverty for good, and the best way to do it is to drive away from it as fast as possible. The condition which is called Post Poverty Stress Disorder makes people want to acquire all the status symbols that would make them appear as if they have never interacted with poverty.
With a Subaru car, memories of historical poverty are erased and as long as the car is in motion, the loud exhaust noise muffles the memories of how hard life used to be.
Confidence in poverty.
PostaMate is a satirical publication by PostaMate Media. Read more HERE