Politics

“Venezuelans used Electromagnetic Radiation to Lower Voter Turnout” – Raila Odinga

Raila Odinga has hit out at Venezuelans who cost him an election victory in the 2022 Kenyan General Elections. Speaking after the reality hit that Kenyans opted for a well-known thief instead of him, Raila said that Venezuelans had interfered with voter turnout in his stronghold, giving his opponent William Ruto an easy victory. “We […]

Politics

Ruto Owes his Victory to my Bad Leadership – Uhuru

Former President Uhuru Kenyatta has taken credit for William Ruto’s win, saying that Ruto would not have seen the gates of State House if he had Uhuru’s support. Speaking from Ichaweri where he spent the morning trapping moles that have been eating his sweet potatoes since 2003, Uhuru said that his action (or lack of […]

Politics

Government Investigating Rigathi Gachagua’s English at the Deputy Presidential Debate

72% of the government went into a mild coma after it emerged that the man who previously could never make sense while holding a microphone might just have been pretending and saving his English for the Deputy Presidential Debate. Following the debate where Rigathi Gachagua managed to keep speaking for 32 minutes, the government has […]

Politics

IEBC Admits that Reuben Kigame Can See Better than the Commission

The Independent Electoral and Boundaries Commission (IEBC) has admitted that Presidential Candidate Reuben Kigame who has been blind since childhood can actually see better than most of its commissioners. Speaking after denying Kigame a chance to be on the ballot, the IEBC Dispute Resolution Committee (DRC) said that Kigame needed to be stopped because his […]

Education Politics

EBK Asks Raila to do 3 Additional Units which he Missed

The Engineers Board of Kenya (EBK) has threatened to deregister Engineer Raila Amollo Odinga after it emerged that he missed three crucial units that are mandatory for registration as an engineer. Speaking during the ongoing Energy Conference, the EBK chair said that all engineers in Kenya must do at least 35 credit hours in Communication […]

Politics

Wajackoyah’s PP2 Certificate Questioned

A section of state affiliated civil societies has demanded to see Presidential Candidate Prof George Wajackoyah’s PP2 graduation certificate as an assurance that he is fit to be the president of Kenya. Adding their voice to the ongoing question of degrees, the state affiliated civil societies said that Wajackoyah’s manifesto of bhang and snakes was […]

Politics

Chebukati; “Raila’s Degree is a Matter of National Insecurity”

IEBC chair Wafula Chebukati can be trusted to keep a secret, especially if his life depends on it. Following demands by Kenyans to see Raila Odinga’s degree certificate, Chebukati has admitted that the degree is a matter of national insecurity, and showing it to the public means that the safety of the said public cannot […]

Politics

Wajackoyah’s Rising Political Star Could Force Raila and Ruto to Unite

The political elites might be forced back to the drawing board after it was revealed that the previously unknown Professor George Wajackoyah commands 16% of all Kenyan votes. Both William Ruto and Raila Odinga have expressed concern that the wind of Wajackoyah is blowing wild and they are willing to do everything to stop him […]

Politics

Kalonzo Musyoka Planning To Give Spoilt Votes A Run For Their Money

New entrant into the Kenyan presidential race Kalonzo Musyoka has promised the mother of all battles against spoilt votes in the 2022 General Elections. In a race where he risks becoming the third runners up (behind spoilt votes), Kalonzo said that he has made arrangement with men he trusts to ensure that he will not […]

Politics

World Leaders react to Appointment of Rigathi Gachagua as Ruto’s Running Mate

Congratulatory messages continue to pour in from different parts of the world following the appointment of Rigathi Gachagua as Ruto’s running mate for the 2022 General Elections. Leader from different parts of the world have reacted differently to the news which caught no one by surprise, although everybody was surprised. From the East Arican community, […]