International Social

CONFIRMED: Osprey Bird that Flew from Finland to Kenya Committed Suicide

A bird that hit headlines after flying from Finland to Kenya but finally died in the care of Kenya Wildlife Services has been confirmed to have committed suicide. 

The endangered Osprey which had been tagged in Finland flew for 6948 kilometres, something that baffled even the self-proclaimed General Miguna Miguna who has recently been unable to move from Berlin to Nairobi. No one knows why the bird headed to Kenya, but the circumstances that led to its death are even baffling.

It has been revealed that the bird was shocked by the living conditions that it found in Kenya after being taken from Kisumu to Nairobi and seeing the level of poverty that Kenyans are facing. It also was confused to see Kenyans busy talking about something called BBI while still many of them had dropped out of school due to lack of school fees and others  are dying of hunger in some places.

But it was the attention that it received that hammered the final nail. In the midst of all the problems  facing Kenya, the introverted bird was shocked to see itself in the news and receive VIP treatment from a country that has more MCAs than toilets. Those traumatizing images are suspected to have made the bird take its own life.

A suicide note left behind by the bird has yet to be translated into human languages as there are no known bird experts who speak the Osprey’s language. They are planning to get another bird to translate it into another bird language which is easy to understand, like chicken, then humans can pick up from there.

Meanwhile, a private jet hired from Russia to transport the remains of the bird back to Finland is expected into the country tomorrow.

Rest in Peace Osprey.

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