Politics

Moses Kuria Reveals How Raila Bewitched Uhuru

Witchcraft has risen to a new height after Gatundu Member of Parliament Moses Kuria revealed that the handshake brotherhood currently running the show was actually founded on witchcraft.

Moses Kuria revealed that the former Prime Minister and designated election loser Raila Odinga had bewitched president Uhuru Kenyatta and this is why the two seemed to get along very well, to the extent of causing rifts in the Jubilee Alliance.

But it is the details of how this happened that is even more shocking, as revealed by Moses Kuria.

How it Happened

According to the legislator, the the President and the People’s President had gone for a holiday in Zanzibar together when the whole drama happened. Raila had won a trip for two in Zanzibar in a competition that was organized by a powerful tender cartel in Nairobi, and chose to invite Uhuru to join him for the holiday.

It was during this holiday that Uhuru got a chance to eat special chicken soup that was only availed to him alone. Unknown to him, the soup was made from a yellow chicken that is used by senior witches in Zanzibar. The hotel was manned by professional witches from all over Africa masquerading as hotel staff.

As soon as Uhuru took the soup, he started dancing to a song that was being played by yet another musician witch, hypnotizing him permanently. Currently, the president does not know what is happening and is confusing Raila for Ruto.

Unfortunately, the chief witch who facilitated the activity died shortly after that, making it impossible to reverse that spell. Moses Kuria admitted that he is mobilizing for powerful witches from Haiti and Nepal to come and undo the spell.