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“Twasn’t me: Blame the Beans.” Waiguru’s Driver

Government drivers attached to VIPs now want their allowances increased so that they can be eating real proteins, instead of beans. This follows a case where one of them was fired after farting while inside the car, something the governor did not take lightly.

Speaking to PostaMate, the neglected government employees said that the only protein they are used to is the beans, not out of choice but economics. This has caused them problems many times including loss of jobs.

“It is not fair when you drop the governor at Hilton for lunch, then you rush to Muthurwa for some lunch, after which you are expected to drive for the next two hours. Beans do not understand that.”

They now want a special ‘meat allowance’ to be introduced so that they can also enjoy their meals, but more importantly, ensure the comfort of their VIP passengers.

“We see no problem getting this passed because whoever is at the receiving end has the powers.”

The driver who was fired by Governor Waiguru blamed the faulty air conditioner in the car, as well as the governor arriving unexpectedly while he was busy breaking wind. “I did not know the governor was just about to walk in. To be sincere, I had farted some three minutes before then but it is just one of those that refuse to go away. It was not my fault.”

Following the concerns, the government plans to allocate 270 million in the next supplementary budget to sole the problem once and for all.