President William has vehemently denied any involvement in the abduction of John Wick’s puppy. This follows social media reports linking him to the puppy’s disappearance, which Ruto strongly refuted. In a hastily convened press conference, Ruto denied any connection to the incident and issued a stern warning to those implicating him: they will face abduction […]
A local Christian couldn’t keep quiet after proudly reporting 100% consistency in reading the Bible daily in 2026. The 22-year-old disciplined and mature Christian noted that his plan to read the entire Bible in one year was already a success, having consistently devoured scripture for the first six days of January, registering a perfect success […]
The Government of Kenya has proposed reforms to the appointment process of Catholic Bishops, citing national security concerns as the reason for their involvement. In a letter addressed to Pope Francis, the Kenyan Government expressed worries that some current Bishops do not meet the standards outlined in Chapter Six of the constitution. They emphasized the […]
Expecting foolish Americans to attempt to migrate to Canada after Donald Trump won the election, Canada has moved with speed to build a 5-meter-tall wall along its 8000 km border with the US to stop the looming influx of dejected Americans. The move followed a realization that it was the end of the road for […]
Nairobi, Kenya – In a twist that has left football fans and political analysts equally bewildered, Musalia Mudavadi, the seasoned politician and current Prime Cabinet Secretary, was named Player of the Year at the recent Football Kenya Federation (FKF) awards gala. The announcement was met with a mix of applause, laughter, and sheer confusion as […]
In a groundbreaking discovery that has left theologians and historians scratching their heads, recent archeological evidence suggests that the Apostle Peter was holding an axe when Jesus famously asked Zacchaeus to come down from the sycamore tree. The discovery was made by a team of archeologists who were excavating what is believed to be the […]
Kenya Airways has asked passengers without luggage to consider alighting around Ngong,’ following the possibility that protesters might occupy JKIA. In a memo to travelers from London, New York, Cairo, Dubai, Mumbai, Amsterdam and Johannesburg, KQ said that it would make sense for passengers to ‘abandon plane’ the moment they spot Ngong’ hills and parachute […]
The Government of Kenya has announced the capture of a dreaded weapon of mouth destruction terrorist Gabriel Oguda following a secret national security operation. Terrorists from the anti-terror wing of the Kenya police swarmed into Gabriel Oguda’s home early Tuesday morning brandishing dictionaries and dangling participles in the hope that the terrorist would not cast […]
Gang leaders in the troubled Caribbean nation of Haiti have offered to send a strong force of 1000 members to restore law and order in the Kenya Police Service. This comes amid increasing police violence against peaceful protesters in Kenya. Haitian gang leader Jimmy Chérizier, alias ‘Barbecue’ said that he was concerned about the increasing […]
Kenyan politicians have warned that a threat to The Finance Bill 2024 is a threat to your safety since a cut in budgeted corruption will force them to come for the money directly from your pockets. Speaking after the second reading of the Finance Bill 2024, Majority Leader Kimani Ichungwa warned that a decline in […]
