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Nairobi, Kenya – In a twist that has left football fans and political analysts equally bewildered, Musalia Mudavadi, the seasoned… Read more: Mudavadi Named Player of the Year During the Recent FKF Awards Gala

In a groundbreaking discovery that has left theologians and historians scratching their heads, recent archeological evidence suggests that the Apostle… Read more: Archeological Evidence shows that Peter was holding an Axe when Jesus asked Zacchaeus to come down the Tree

Kenya Airways has asked passengers without luggage to consider alighting around Ngong,’ following the possibility that protesters might occupy JKIA.… Read more: Kenya Airways to Drop Inbound Passengers in Ngong

The Government of Kenya has announced the capture of a dreaded weapon of mouth destruction terrorist Gabriel Oguda following a… Read more: Kindiki Announces Capture of the Dreaded Weapon of Mouth Destruction Terrorist

Gang leaders in the troubled Caribbean nation of Haiti have offered to send a strong force of 1000 members to… Read more: Haiti Offers to Send 1000 Gang Members to Rehabilitate the Kenyan Police

Kenyan politicians have warned that a threat to The Finance Bill 2024 is a threat to your safety since a… Read more: “Either we Tax you the easy way, or we will rob you the old way.” – MPs

The International Monetary Fund has expressed confidence that the running of Project Kenya is still satisfactory, even though the designated… Read more: IMF OK with Ruto’s Regular Visit to Kenya

In an unprecedented event that has left Brits steaming, an American tourist in London was arrested after committing the unfathomable… Read more: Brewing Trouble: American Tourist in Hot Water Over Microwaved Tea in the UK

Kenya’s president Dr. WIlliam Ruto has cautioned his North American ally President Joe Biden against unlawful practices during the 2024… Read more: Ruto Warns Biden against Rigging the 2024 US Election

Every day, millions of drivers around the world engage in a dangerous and addictive game: trying to beat the GPS… Read more: Increase in Road Accidents Attributed to Drivers Trying to Beat GPS Time Estimate

Local businessman and self-made millionaire, John Mwangi, has announced his retirement from the world of entrepreneurship after securing a coveted… Read more: 27-Year-Old Entrepreneur Retires After Landing a Job at Quickmart

The Kenya Medical Training College (KMTC) has announced a new unit for all aspiring medics: How to Migrate to the… Read more: KMTC to Teach Students How to Migrate to UK

NANYUKI, KENYA – In a press conference held at one of the conservancies in Northern Kenya, billionaire philanthropist Bill Gates… Read more: Bill Gates Unveils Plan to Turn Lions into Vegetarians

WASHINGTON—Expressing frustration over the lack of a viable pretext for military action, U.S. officials confirmed Monday that they were disappointed… Read more: U.S. Says Kenya’s Cobalt Deposits Not Sufficient to Warrant Intervention

The world was shocked when Donald Trump announced his intention to run for president again in 2024, after being impeached… Read more: How to Survive the Second Coming of Donald Trump

TORONTO, ON – A new study from the University of Toronto has revealed a shocking trend: Nigerian men who migrate… Read more: Nigerian Immigrants Losing Their Wives to Canadian Casanovas, Study Finds

It’s that time of the year again when parents across the country have to face the harsh reality of paying… Read more: National Anger Up 9% Fueled by Back to School Season

NAIROBI, KENYA—As millions of employees resumed their work routines after a prolonged festive season, IT departments across the country reported… Read more: Password Reset Requests Skyrocket as Workers Return to Office After Long Holiday

It’s that time of the year again, when billions of people make a vow to get fit and healthy in… Read more: Resolutions Inspired Gym Newbies Causing Nightmares

An average Kenyan spent 7.2 days aimlessly binging on WhatsApp status in 2023, data from the think tank independent Ridgeviews… Read more: Whatsapp Status Obsession: Kenyans Wasted a Week in 2023, Study Finds

In the bustling world of political Kenya, there’s a certain Cabinet Secretary who has become quite the globetrotter. This jet-setting… Read more: Jet-Setting Cabinet Secretary Outpaces Kajiado County in Carbon Emissions!

The recently announced Social Health Insurance Fund will offer third-party health insurance coverage in a bid to attract more Kenyans… Read more: Social Health Insurance Fund to offer Third-Party Health Insurance Cover

A shocking revelation has hit the Kenyan Gen Zers hard as they learned that they would be enjoying the privileges… Read more: Kenyan Gen Z Cry Foul as They Discover They Would Be British Citizens If Not for Independence

In a shocking turn of events, OpenAI, the leading artificial intelligence research lab, has announced plans to lay off 700… Read more: OpenAI Replaces 700 Employees with ChatGPT

NAIROBI, KENYA—Lamenting that his once-thriving business of tempting and tormenting humans was now in shambles, Satan announced Monday that he… Read more: Satan Says He Can’t Compete With TikTok And Kenyan Government In Corrupting Souls

In a shocking turn of events, Kenya’s strategic guava reserve has been depleted. The culprit? None other than Gabriel Oguda,… Read more: Kenya’s Strategic Guava Reserve Depleted

In a surprising turn of events, the Ugandan government has been voted the “Most Emotional and Petty Government in the… Read more: Uganda’s Government Voted World’s Pettiest

In a shocking move, King Charles III of the United Kingdom and 15 other Commonwealth realms has expressed his desire… Read more: King Charles III to Relocate to Kenya If Made King

The United Nations (UN) has announced a new initiative to address one of the most pressing issues facing humanity: the… Read more: The UN’s Mission to Solve the Mystery of the Missing Socks

NAIROBI, KENYA—A new study by the University of Nairobi has found that friendships in Nairobi are worthless, and that most… Read more: Nairobi Friends Are Worthless, Study Finds

NAIROBI, KENYA—The Central Bank of Kenya (CBK) announced today that it has hired two construction companies to oversee the controlled… Read more: CBK Hires Two Construction Companies to Oversee the Controlled Demolition of the Shilling

John Smith, a 35-year-old accountant from Kansas City, Missouri, is enjoying a peaceful and happy life because he knows nothing… Read more: The Secret to Peace: A Local Man Who Knows Nothing About the Middle East

Nairobi Water and Sewerage Company (NWSC) has issued a public notice asking residents of the city to refrain from pooping… Read more: Nairobi Water Asks Residents to Stop Pooping in the Morning to Ease Sewer Congestion

The Kenya Kwanza government has issued a public apology for the delay in fulfilling its campaign promise of bringing El… Read more: Isaac Mwaura Apologizes for Kenya Kwanza’s Delay in Fulfilling its Pledge of Causing El Niño in Kenya.

NAIROBI, KENYA – John Mwangi, a 65-year-old father of three, has been struggling with his sugar addiction for years. He… Read more: 65-Year-Old Dad Who Can’t Quit Sugar Wonders Why His 27-Year-Old Son Can’t Quit Alcohol

The National Museums of Kenya has announced that they will remain closed during the entire period of the visit of… Read more: Kenya Museums to Stay Shut as King Charles Visits

In a controversial move, Kenya Airways has decided to charge passengers based on the combined weight of their body and… Read more: Kenya Airways to Charge Passengers by Weight

A youth pastor from a local church has been exposed as a normal guy who could play rough, commit fouls,… Read more: Youth Pastor Exposed as a Normal Guy After Football Match

The International Association of Athletics Federations (IAAF) has announced a new rule for marathon races starting from 2023: medals will… Read more: New Marathon Rule: Medals for the Best Non-East African Runners

HARARE, ZIMBABWE—In a bold move to combat the rising unemployment rate and the growing bedbug infestation in France, the Zimbabwean… Read more: Zimbabwe Sends 5,000 Jobless People to Fight Bedbugs in France

Pastor James Ng’ang’a, the self-proclaimed commander of NENO Evangelism Center, has announced his intention to run for the highest office… Read more: Commander Ng’ang’a: The Prophet Who Wants to Be President

The government of Haiti has pledged to send 1000 witches to Kenya to help prop up the Kenyan judiciary that… Read more: Haiti to Send 1000 Witches to Help Prop up the Crumbling Kenyan Judiciary

A man from Murang’a County has been fined Ksh 1.5 million by the Data Protection Office (DPO) for posting a… Read more: Man Fined for Posting Girlfriend’s Photo on Social Media Without Consent

NAIROBI, KENYA—In a bold move to increase tax collection and compliance, the Kenya Revenue Authority (KRA) announced on Thursday that… Read more: KRA to Hire an Agent To Live In Every Kenyan Home

In a shocking move, the Kenyan government has announced a new policy that will impose a tax on every fourth… Read more: Government to Tax Every 4th Child in Kenya

YouTube, the world’s largest video-sharing platform, has recently sent a warm reminder to all content creators that it is in… Read more: YouTube Sends Warm Reminder to Kenyan Content Creators That it is in Complete Control of Their Livelihood

A new report from the Kenya National Bureau of Statistics has revealed that millions of Gen-Zers are facing bankruptcy due… Read more: Mutura and Mahindi Choma Addiction Leads to Bankruptcy for Millions of Gen-Zers

In a desperate attempt to boost their dwindling numbers, Harakat al-Shabaab al-Mujahideen, commonly known as al-Shabaab, has launched a new… Read more: Al-Shabab Launches New Campaign to Recruit Short People

NAIROBI, Kenya – A jobless man in Nairobi has decided to take a week off from his daily routine of… Read more: Jobless Man Takes Annual Leave, Says He Deserves a Break

Software engineers are among the most sought-after and well-paid professionals in the world. They create the software that powers our… Read more: Why Software Engineers Have Short Life Expectancy

Embattled millionaire Pastor Ezekiel Odero has threatened to plunge Kenya into an endless cycle of poverty, ignorance, and diseases if… Read more: Pastor Ezekiel Threatens to Delete Kenya’s Star Permanently

Kenya is set to become the first African country to launch its own cryptocurrency, the KenCoin, which will be backed… Read more: Kenya to Launch Its Own KenCoin in Response to WorldCoin

In a shocking twist of events, the leader of the military coup that overthrew the democratically elected government of the… Read more: Military Coup Leader Claims He Was Just Following Orders

The Premier League has announced that it will introduce new rules for the 2023/24 season, aimed at making the competition… Read more: Premier League to Introduce New Rules to Make the Competition More Fair and Exciting

LONDON, UK—A maths teacher at a local high school has boasted that he can solve any equation, no matter how… Read more: Maths Teacher Claims He Can Solve Any Equation, Students Challenge Him With Their Personal Problems

The World Bank has praised the poor countries of the world for reducing poverty by dying, saying that they have… Read more: World Bank Praises Poor Countries for Reducing Poverty by Dying

In a bold move to silence critics and uphold national unity, the government of Kenya has issued a decree that… Read more: Kenya Cracks Down on Police State Allegations with Six Strokes of Cane

Kenya’s first white-turbaned legislator Hon. Eric Muchangi, also known as Karemba, is facing an existential crisis after his church vowed… Read more: Runyenjes MP to be Excommunicated from Akorino Church for Supporting Housing Fund

The Government of Kenya has moved a notch higher in selling the Housing Fund idea, with the Housing and Urban… Read more: Housing Fund Renamed to Mini Tithe to Enhance Compliance

In a stunning display of gratitude towards medical interns, the Ministry of Health has treated them to a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity:… Read more: Medical Interns Enjoy 5 Months of Donkey Work Without Pay, Minister Basks in Social Media Glamour

Nairobi, Kenya – In a remarkable turn of events, citizens across the nation have put their cynicism aside and wholeheartedly… Read more: Kenyans show excitement over the Housing Fund, promise to Support Ruto’s initiatives

Nairobi, Kenya – In a stunning display of progressive governance, the esteemed President of Kenya, Dr. William Samoei Ruto, has… Read more: President of Kenya Introduces Groundbreaking Car Purchase Fund: Because Who Needs Shelter Anyway

The Government of Kenya has warned that service delivery may be at risk due to an acute shortage of competent… Read more: Service delivery at Risk as GoK runs out of competent Kalenjins

As the body count rises, many are shocked at how little-known Paul Mackenzie was able to deceive and manipulate so… Read more: 8 Survivors of Pastor Paul Mackenzie’s Cult in Shakahola Speak Out

The Government of Kenya is planning for a national fundraiser to resolve the liquidity crisis that has rocked the East… Read more: GoK Announces a National Harambee to Resolve Liquidity

Bandits in the counties of Samburu, Turkana, Elgeyo Marakwet, Baringo, West Pokot, and Laikipia have opened the door for engagements… Read more: Bandits Call for a more Inclusive Tripartisan Talks with the Government

There was an unusual event on Kiambu Road when a senior DCI agent attached to Pastor James Ng’ang’a of Neno… Read more: DCI Agent Attached to Pastor Ng’ang’a Finally Gives his Life to Jesus

Opposition Chief Raila Odinga has unveiled a plan to recruit 17,000 orcs that will help him get rid of the… Read more: Raila Enlists Army of Orcs to Prop Up Mass Action Threats

The Supreme Court of Kenya recently opened a can of worms after it ruled to allow for the registration of… Read more: Pedophile Association of Kenya gets Supreme Court nod for Registration

The Competition Authority has drafted regulations to control the dominance of the Kamba community in the sale, repair, and distribution… Read more: Competition Authority to Rein in Kambas in Tire Business

The Kenya National Examinations Council has announced plans to drop the use of teachers in marking KCSE exams and replace… Read more: KNEC to Mark 2023 KCSE Using ChatGPT

A crisis is looming in Kenya after the ministry of Agriculture announced the dwindling cabbage reserves – with an eminent… Read more: Kenya to Run Out of Cabbage by January 25

The future of cooking looks promising after a student at the famous Jomo Kenyatta University of Agriculture and Technology invented… Read more: JKUAT Student Invents Charcoal that’s 31% Cannabis

A family in Doha, Qatar, can now breathe a sigh of relief after the 32-year-old perfectly healthy and normal son… Read more: <strong>Optimism Rekindled as 32-Year-Old lastborn Starts to Bathe Himself</strong>

It did not come as a shock when Statehouse announced that Ruto had Ex- Kiambu governor Ferdinand Waititu as a… Read more: <strong>Waititu to Move Rivers and Create more Land for Ruto – Statehouse Insider</strong>

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The Law Society of Kenya has come to the rescue of intern lawyers, popularly known as pupils, following a revelation… Read more: LSK Orders Advocates to Provide Pupils with Transport Brooms

An unlikely victim of inflation and the high cost of living is a familiar figure – roaches. With food rationed… Read more: House Cockroaches Increasingly Starving to Death as Inflation Bites

The World Health Organization’s health systems performance index has placed nurses in Kenya in the 3rd position on the healthcare… Read more: Nurses in Kenya Ranked 3rd Most Cruel in the World

The burden on birth control is about to shift from women to men after scientists got a major breakthrough in… Read more: New Oral Male Contraceptive to be Administered through Free Beer

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