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Local Man Unlocks Dreaded Third Level of Primitive Accumulation of Tools

A local man is just about to have his financial plans short-circuited after he accidentally unlocked the dreaded third phase of primitive accumulation of tools that he will never use. What started as a teenage hobby has turned out to be a form of economic suicide after the man was unable to quit the dreaded […]

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LSK Orders Advocates to Provide Pupils with Transport Brooms

The Law Society of Kenya has come to the rescue of intern lawyers, popularly known as pupils, following a revelation that they have been getting the short end of the stick on matters of transport. Following complaints from advocates who cannot stand to see a pupil earning a salary of KShs 18,000 (before statutory deductions) […]

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New Oral Male Contraceptive to be Administered through Free Beer

The burden on birth control is about to shift from women to men after scientists got a major breakthrough in administering the oral male birth control pill. Several months after its launch, the male birth control pill failed to take off because scientists could not get men to swallow the pill. They are not even […]

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Machakos County Bans Dowry Payment During the Ongoing Dry Season

Machakos County Governor Wavinya Ndeti has banned all payment of dowry activities during the ongoing drought, terming the activity as exploitative. In one of her first executive orders, Ndeti said that many families were being taken advantage of by being offered very little dowry because they lack the capacity to negotiate for more. Consequently, the […]

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Kalonzo Musyoka in the Race to Succeed Queen Elizabeth

Veteran Kenyan politician Stephen Kalonzo Musyoka has expressed interest in succeeding Queen Elizabeth in the Monarchy of the United Kingdom. Following the untimely death of Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II, Kalonzo tossed his hat into the ring and expressed confidence that the people of the United Kingdom would appoint him King as restitution for the […]

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Designer of Nissan Juke Finally Euthanized in Japan

Justice was finally served in the populous Kanagawa Prefecture of Japan after the Yokohama District Court gave orders for the designer of Nissan Juke to be put to sleep in a humane way. After 12 years of being an eyesore to the world, haters of Nissan Juke had filed a case to have some form […]

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Rigathi Gachagua Vows to Dismantle all Fashion Cartels

Deputy President elect Rigathi Gachagua is off to a quick start, promising to deal with fashion cartels that have kept young Kenyans in perpetual poverty. In his first presser, Rigathi Gachagua noted that one of the agents that Lords of Poverty have been using to reign over hustlers is fashion, noting that Kenyans are now […]

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Man Suffers Second Degree Burns after sharing Bathtub with Wife

What started as a romantic gesture ended up as a traumatic venture after a man suffered serious burns when he joined the wife for a bath. The lazy evening in the outskirts of Kampala was jolted to life when the man plunged into the hot bathtub where the wife was relaxing, thinking that the water […]

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Small Claims Court Rules Against Girl who ‘Ate Fare’

The Small Claims Court in Nairobi has ruled against a girl who was ‘sent fare’ by a male colleague but failed to turn up for a birthday party as agreed. In the case filed the Milimani Small Claims Court, a gentleman identified as BCN said that he had sent KShs 3000 to a lady by […]