NAIROBI, KENYA—A new study by the University of Nairobi has found that friendships in Nairobi are worthless, and that most people in the city are better off without them. The study, which surveyed over 10,000 Nairobi residents, revealed that friendships in Nairobi are overvalued by up to 30% and that they offer no real benefits to the people.
The study found that most of those friendships are based on superficial factors, such as appearance, status, or convenience, and that they lack depth, trust, and commitment. It also found that most friends in Nairobi are unreliable, dishonest, and selfish, and that they often betray, exploit, or abandon their friends when they need them the most.
The study cited several examples of how friendships in Nairobi are overvalued, such as:
- No one gives you money when you need it urgently. The study found that most friends in Nairobi are stingy and greedy, and that they always have excuses for not lending money to their friends. The study also found that most friends in Nairobi never pay back the money they borrow from their friends, and that they often ghost or block their friends who ask for their money back.
- Everyone says they are always broke but still making big investments. The study found that most friends in Nairobi are hypocritical and dishonest, and that they always lie about their financial situation. The study also found that most friends in Nairobi are envious and competitive, and that they always try to outdo their friends by making big investments, such as buying cars, houses, or businesses.
- Your best friend can easily date your ex. The study found that most friends in Nairobi are disloyal and unfaithful, and that they have no respect for their friends’ relationships. The study also found that most friends in Nairobi are promiscuous and opportunistic, and that they always try to date or sleep with their friends’ exes, regardless of how their friends feel about it.
The study concluded that friendships in Nairobi are worthless, and that most people in the city are better off without them. The study recommended that people in Nairobi should focus on themselves and their families, and avoid making or keeping friends in the city. The study also suggested that people in Nairobi should seek professional help if they feel lonely or depressed, and avoid relying on their friends for emotional support.