WASHINGTON—Expressing frustration over the lack of a viable pretext for military action, U.S. officials confirmed Monday that they were disappointed by the recent discovery of cobalt deposits in Kenya, saying it was not enough to warrant sending democracy to the African nation. “We were hoping to find something more substantial, like uranium or oil, that […]
The world was shocked when Donald Trump announced his intention to run for president again in 2024, after being impeached twice, banned from social media, and sued by multiple states and individuals. Many people wondered how he could possibly have any supporters left, let alone enough to win the election. But as we learned from […]
TORONTO, ON – A new study from the University of Toronto has revealed a shocking trend: Nigerian men who migrate to Canada are losing their wives to the more romantic Canadian men. The study, which surveyed over 1,000 Nigerian-Canadian couples, found that 87% of Nigerian women reported being happier and more satisfied with their Canadian […]
In a shocking turn of events, OpenAI, the leading artificial intelligence research lab, has announced plans to lay off 700 of its human employees and replace them with its own creation, ChatGPT. The decision comes after a late-night board meeting where the AI itself made a compelling argument about its ability to perform the tasks […]
The United Nations (UN) has announced a new initiative to address one of the most pressing issues facing humanity: the problem of socks missing one partner. The UN Secretary-General, Antonio Guterres, said that this issue has caused “untold suffering and frustration” for millions of people around the world, and that it is time to take […]
John Smith, a 35-year-old accountant from Kansas City, Missouri, is enjoying a peaceful and happy life because he knows nothing about the Middle East conflict. Smith, who has never traveled outside the US, said that he has no interest in learning about the history, politics, or culture of the region, and that he prefers to […]
The National Museums of Kenya has announced that they will remain closed during the entire period of the visit of King Charles III, the monarch of the United Kingdom and other Commonwealth realms. The authorities said that all the museum facilities in the country will remain closed and under increased security during the visit, although […]
HARARE, ZIMBABWE—In a bold move to combat the rising unemployment rate and the growing bedbug infestation in France, the Zimbabwean government announced on Friday that it will send 5,000 jobless people to the European country to fight the pesky insects. The initiative, dubbed “Operation Bug Buster”, is part of a bilateral agreement between Zimbabwe and […]
In a shocking twist of events, the leader of the military coup that overthrew the democratically elected government of the Republic of Bananastan has claimed that he was just following orders from his superiors. General Banana Peel, who led the coup on Monday, said that he had no choice but to execute the plan that […]
The World Bank has praised the poor countries of the world for reducing poverty by dying, saying that they have made significant progress in achieving the Sustainable Development Goals (SDGs). According to the latest report by the World Bank, the number of people living in extreme poverty, defined as living on less than $1.90 a […]
