Kalonzo Musyoka in the Race to Succeed Queen Elizabeth

Veteran Kenyan politician Stephen Kalonzo Musyoka has expressed interest in succeeding Queen Elizabeth in the Monarchy of the United Kingdom. Following the untimely death of Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II, Kalonzo tossed his hat into the ring and expressed confidence that the people of the United Kingdom would appoint him King as restitution for the […]


Kalonzo Musyoka Planning To Give Spoilt Votes A Run For Their Money

New entrant into the Kenyan presidential race Kalonzo Musyoka has promised the mother of all battles against spoilt votes in the 2022 General Elections. In a race where he risks becoming the third runners up (behind spoilt votes), Kalonzo said that he has made arrangement with men he trusts to ensure that he will not […]


OKA to Build Bedsitters Under the Nairobi Expressway

The One Kenya Alliance (OKA) principals have announced a plan to build bedsitters under the Nairobi Expressway, an initiative that will solve 60% of all problems facing Kenya today. Announcing the plan, OKA principals Musalia Mudavadi (ANC), Kalonzo Musyoka (Wiper), Kanu chairman Gideon Moi and Ford Kenya leader Moses Wetangula said that the Expressway could […]


Hopes that Moi Will Resurrect Dwindle One Year After Death

A year after the former president of Kenya Daniel Toroitich arap Moi passed on, hopes that he will one day resurrect and establish an everlasting dynasty in Kenya have nearly diminished. Immediately after death, it was expected that Moi would rise again after three days. Days became weeks, weeks became months and the months are […]


Shock as Kalonzo Quits Politics to Become a Prophet

In a big twist that has left political analysts and pundits shocked to the core, Kalonzo retired from politics to become a prophet. This is after he prophesied that Deputy President William Ruto will be Official Opposition Leader after the forthcoming 2022 general elections. During an interview with Citizen TV’s Waihiga Mwaura, Kalonzo promised to […]


Kalonzo Finally Relinquishes his Melon Tendencies to join Jubilee

Kalonzo Muskoka has finally come out of his melon shell to join President Kenyatta’s Jubilee coalition, but without formally denouncing the NASA pact. The decision leaves the indecisive soft-spoken political skimmer at an elevated position likely to benefit from either side of the political divide. While affirming this, Kalonzo quoted Chinua Achebe’s Arrow of God […]