ADDIS ABABA, ETHIOPIA — In a shocking turn of events that surprised absolutely no one, Raila Odinga, Kenya’s perennial political phoenix, was once again ousted from a high-stakes election, this time for the Chairperson of the African Union Commission. Odinga, who has more experience with election disputes than most countries have constitutions, immediately cried foul […]
The African Union (AU) has come out to strongly condemn the decision by President Donald Trump to halt all forms of aid to African countries, terming the move draconian and outrightly stupid. In a statement that was issued from the Chinese-funded AU headquarters in Addis Ababa, AU heads of state warned that Donald Trump was […]
The Government of Kenya has proposed reforms to the appointment process of Catholic Bishops, citing national security concerns as the reason for their involvement. In a letter addressed to Pope Francis, the Kenyan Government expressed worries that some current Bishops do not meet the standards outlined in Chapter Six of the constitution. They emphasized the […]
The Government of Kenya has announced the capture of a dreaded weapon of mouth destruction terrorist Gabriel Oguda following a secret national security operation. Terrorists from the anti-terror wing of the Kenya police swarmed into Gabriel Oguda’s home early Tuesday morning brandishing dictionaries and dangling participles in the hope that the terrorist would not cast […]
The International Monetary Fund has expressed confidence that the running of Project Kenya is still satisfactory, even though the designated manager relocated out of the country. Speaking to higher powers that she must answer to, IMF Mission Chief to Kenya Haimanot Teferra said that Ruto is a regular visitor to Kenya and during his short […]
The Kenya Medical Training College (KMTC) has announced a new unit for all aspiring medics: How to Migrate to the UK. The unit, which will be compulsory for all students, aims to equip them with the skills and knowledge needed to pursue a lucrative career in the British National Health Service (NHS). According to the […]
The recently announced Social Health Insurance Fund will offer third-party health insurance coverage in a bid to attract more Kenyans from the private sector into the fund. Speaking at the launch of the services, the Health CS said that the third party will transform healthcare in the country through an innovative approach. The new cover […]
The Kenya Kwanza government has issued a public apology for the delay in fulfilling its campaign promise of bringing El Niño rains to the drought-stricken country. The new government spokesman, Isaac Mwaura, explained that the cause of the delay was a technical error in the KenyaSat satellite, which had mistakenly captured Amazon Web Services Nairobi […]
The government of Haiti has pledged to send 1000 witches to Kenya to help prop up the Kenyan judiciary that is crumbling under the weight of escalating corruption. The witches, who are experts in traditional forms of justice, will offer their services to, the Kenyan courts and magistrates, who have been struggling with corruption, inefficiency […]
NAIROBI, KENYA—In a bold move to increase tax collection and compliance, the Kenya Revenue Authority (KRA) announced on Thursday that it will hire an agent to live in every home in the country. The agents, who will be trained and equipped by the KRA, will monitor every household’s income and expenditure, and report any tax […]
