Religion

Possibility that Jesus will Make a Second Coming Via Zoom Highly Likely

The possibility that Jesus will make his second coming via Zoom is now more likely than ever, following the events of 2020 and a careful study of the Holy Scriptures by leading Theologians.

2020 has become the year when every essential public activity moved to the Cloud, leading to a speculation that Jesus could just show up on Zoom and take his people, leaving millions of people who are offline. New evidence now shows that this is not only possible, but is likely to happen.

Theologians who dug deeper into the Bible have found glaring evidence that Jesus had hinted that he would show up via Zoom. Starting from his ascension, it was reported in Acts 1:9 that ‘He was lifted up while they were looking on, and a cloud received Him out of their sight.’ This implies that when he makes the second coming, it will be from the Cloud.

Currently, the most likely Cloud that he will use is Zoom Cloud meetings. Google Cloud, Amazon Web Services and Azure are also possible candidates but since He will be coming for people and not data, Zoom Cloud Meetings is the preferred Cloud.

But that is not enough evidence. A look at 1 Thessalonians 4:17 clearly states that ‘Then we who are alive and remain will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord.’ Revelation 1:7 states that ‘Behold, He is coming with the cloud.’ This is all the evidence that Theologians needed to conclude that people need to take Zoom seriously if they want to be among the number when the saints go marching in.

Zoom CEO Eric Yuan was unreachable for comment, but his office reported that he was ready for the second coming of Christ.