The year that never was is coming to an end. It has been a tough time especially when you had a dry cough and thought that your days are numbered, but thankfully you have made it this far. It was also a great time for satire from PostaMate. Here we take a look at six satirical Stories that broke the internet in Kenya. No particular order.
- 2NK SACCO eyeing Kenya Airways
Kenya Airways is always in the news, majorly for its ability to make losses that no one would expect. The pride of Africa has made over KShs 100 billion in losses in the last 10 years, and Kenyans attribute this to mismanagement.
When PostaMate reported that one of the most organized matatu SACCOs in Kenya was set to acquire the ailing airline, a few people got excited. Some thought that this would be a brilliant move, others felt that KQ had already fallen to the lowest and so nothing get worse.
This is something that should have happened.
- Kenyans finally Recognized as the bullies they are on Twitter
Kenyans online are known to be bullies.
PostaMate reported that the United Nations Office on Drugs and Crime had ranked Kenya as the worst bullies on Twitter. Many people actually believed this because it confirmed something they had always thought. It said that Kenyans had bullied countries, corporations, and even their own president out of Twitter (there is some truth in that, although the president came to admit that later). Several well-known people shared the article perhaps without realizing that it was satire.
The editor had also mentioned that Kenyans bullied a pangolin to death, just to help people know for sure that it was satire, but that was not enough.
This article is still trending today, and yes, Kenyans on Twitter are not angels.
- Even without exams, Magoha was set to announce the KCSE Results
The school calendar was disrupted by Covid-19 and consequently, the national exams were not held this year.
This article claimed that the fiery Education CS George Magoha was planning to release the KCSE results in 2020, saying that the government had already made preparations for the results as they usually do not depend on exams. The CS explained that the results are arrived at by “assigning a few A’s to Kenya High School, ensuring that half of the students get E’s in Mathematics, making sure that girls perform better than boys in English, and lastly giving the best student from Northern Kenya a grade C.”
This story was trending for some time, perhaps because many people were interested in knowing about the fate of 2020 KCSE.
A little known dusty town of Kiambu County that is best known for hosting Jomo Kenyatta University of Agriculture and Technology had it’s 15 seconds of fame. PostaMate reported that Interpol had raised concerns that the little town had become a global cybercrime hotspot due to high concentration of idle minds in the town.
The article describes the new type of criminals that the Directorate of Criminal Investigation has failed to net. “Today’s cyber criminal in Juja does not even drive, lives in a one bed-roomed house where there is water shortage and is always late on rent payment. You will see them walking around in shorts and flip flops and think they have run out of options in life, but unknown to you the same person owns a cruise ship in the Maldives. They have learnt the art of economic camouflage.”
Cybercrime is always a topic of interest to many.
- Bank Teller decided to work from home
In 2020, we were all supposed to be working from home. A bank Teller received the memo and acted in the most obvious way possible. He packed some cash from the bank, then attempted to walk out of the bank under the pretext that he was going to work from home.
“The incidence has caused a stir on social media with people wondering whether the person is a thief, or a law abiding citizen who was trying to follow the presidential directive. His co-workers described him as a quiet and hardworking man who lately has been following all the news on Covid-19 outbreak.”
- Millionaire Gideon Moi and poverty
Every politician wants to identify with poverty in order to appeal to the poor voters. In this article, the son of the former President of Kenya (Moi – who died a few days after the article was written) narrates how he grew up in abject poverty.
“Even at the University of Salford, I had very little money and had to limit my international travels since I could not afford. I watched as children of other African dictators lived in luxury while I barely survived through University.”
Based on the reactions to the article, it is evident that many people thought the article was true. Not because it was bad satire, but because our politics has become so bad that we can expect anything.
Which was your favorite story?
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