International

60 Al-Shabaab Militants Killed after Unpaid Intern Tests if a Bomb was Working

Harakat al-Shabaab al-Mujahideen, more commonly known as al-Shabaab, scored a lethal own goal after an intern exploded a bomb at the center of training camp during a routine maintenance activity.

The new recruit who had been assigned to the explosives team found an old, dust covered bomb that was donated ten years ago by Al Qaeda as a form of technical assistance. All signs showed that the bomb was as dead as a stone, and a previous terrorist in the same position had recommended that the bomb should be disposed by burning it in a crowded place in Kenya.

However, no action was taken since Al Shabaab has been slow on waste disposal, just like any other government.

However, this intern who had been in the job for only two weeks decided to test if the bomb was indeed dead. He dusted the thing, set the timer to 60 seconds and waited. Exactly after 60 seconds, there were no survivors left to confirm that the bomb was indeed working.

Al-Shabaab Statement

Al-Shabaab issued a statement mourning the wastage of a good bomb and destruction of property in a secret camp.

“We lost a working bomb and our cover has been blown. It is sad that the 60 men left earlier than intended, although that does not hurt too much because they were to become suicide bombers anyway.”

Some young recruits questioned whether the dead counted as true Mujahideen, considering that they did not take out any target. However, their commander reassured them that the 60 patriots had sent a message to the world that interns are of no value, thus helping to destabilize the labor supply of the enemies.

The commander added that the intern had followed the good old principle of never letting a good bomb go to waste.