Government: “We will Continue with Demolitions until you stop Voting in Morons”

The government has finally spoken its heart out about the demolitions and regular fires at Gikomba market, placing the blame squarely on Kenyans.

In what could be the first honest statement from the government, traders at the Gikomba market were told that they will keep experiencing fires and demolitions if they do not change their voting patterns. Whereas the government chose to feign sympathy after the previous fires, this time it was tired of pretending.

“If you keep voting in morons who cannot fight for your rights, we will keep demolishing. As long as there is no one to fight for you, we will keep fighting you,” said an agitated government spokesman. “Choices have consequences and right now it is your political choices that are failing you.”

The hard hitting truth fell on deaf ears and Kenyans vowed to keep electing their thieves but still hope that things will change. One man whose kiosk was demolished said that the demolition was a matter of an excavator at work and not ballot choices. Another one told us to keep their elected leaders out of the mess being done by the national government.

While the situation is confusing, the government’s position is the right one. The president, the people’s president and the deputy president  are not moved by the current fires although on 8th August 2017, the trio received more than 99% of all the votes that were cast.

Cut out the middleman by joining our Telegram Channel below.


This is PostaMate notification channel. We bring to you the best of satire.