Tomato traders in various markets in Kenya will now receive 24/7 police protection as the cost of the fruit-cum-vegetable hits an all time high of KShs 25 per piece, from the usual price of KShs 2. So high is the price that it matches that of apples, the most luxurious fruit in the tropical Africa, […]
Author: Editor
BREAKING: Moi’s Grave Found Empty
Shock engulfed the late President Daniel Moi’s home in Kabarak when his grave was found empty early on Saturday morning, barely three days after his burial. In the early morning incidence, Moi’s grandchildren had gone to the burial site to add more flowers when it suddenly dawned on them that the soldiers who had been […]
South African president Cyril Ramaphosa Gives the Wrong State of the Nation Address, Nobody Notices
South Africans were caught up in a time capsule moment when the President Cyril Ramaphosa accidentally read the same state of the nation address as the one he gave two years ago, with no one realizing that history was literally repeating itself. In a Televised speech from the nations parliament, the president removed a copy […]
Bucket Full of Stones Found to be More Intelligent than a Kenyan Voter
Researchers at Kenya Medical Research Institute have found out that a bucket full of stones possesses more intelligence than an average Kenyan voter, especially during an election year. The shocking study was conducted in all the 47 counties in Kenya, where a sample of 3 million voters was used and the level of intelligent compared […]
WhatsApp Introduces One Person Group for Introverts
You can now form a one person WhatsApp group and invite all your zero friends, in the new update released this week. The special feature that is only available to introverts allows one to create a group without adding any member, a feature that introverts have been campaigning for all over the world. It is […]
Lastborn Admitted to ICU in Critical Condition After Washing Two Cups
An unidentified lastborn was yesterday admitted to Nairobi Hospital after suffering from chronic fatigue following a heavy days work that involved cleaning two cups. The 19-year-old was wheeled into the emergency section complaining of a possible multiple organ failure as there was pain all over his body, and a serious overwork-induced-headache. The hospital was brought […]
Survey Shows Most Kenyans Could go to Kabarak for Just Bread and Soda
Kenyans have started flocking to Kabarak for the final send off of the former president of Kenya Daniel Toroitich arap Moi. Announcing the preparation plans for the event, the Ministry of Interior Principal Secretary Karanja Kibicho announced that there would be bread, soda and water for the first 30,000 people to arrive at the venue, […]
Kenya to Revise the Lords Prayer to ‘Forgive us Our Loans’
As Kenya’s Debt to GDP Ratio approaches an astronomical figure of 1981%, the government is taking all the possible steps to deal with the cloud of debt that now threats every shilling earned in Kenya. Recent suggestions put forward from the Treasury in collaboration with the church leaders will see the Lord’s prayer revised from […]
Kiambu Governor Attributes the Embarrassing Moi Farewell Message to Autocorrect
Barely a week after James Nyoro was sworn in as the governor of Kiambu County, residents have been hit by the reality that there was no change in the level of language skills even after Waititu left. In what was supposed to be a moving tribute to the former president of Kenya Daniel Moi, the […]
Nairobi Women’s Hospital Partners with Prophet Owuor to Provide Instant Healing
Desperate times call for desperate measures. The Nairobi Women’s Hospital has partnered with the Mightiest Prophet of God, Dr David Owuor, to offer instant healing services to its customers, err…sorry, patients. The new arrangement will see all the patients admitted at the hospital pay a standard fee equivalent to one week admission, but receive healing […]






